Researchers tell us that 80-85% of people around the world suffer
from low self-esteem, including those in the United States. I think most
of us believe that those who have money, fame and a winning personality are
exempt from this. However, when interviewed, some of those famous people
surprise us with their candidness about their struggle with self-esteem.
For example, actress Demi Moore shocked many in a 2012 interview
with Harper's Bazaar when she exclaimed, "What scares me is that I'm
going to ultimately find out at the end of my life that I'm really not lovable,
that I'm not worthy of being loved. That there's something fundamentally wrong
with me...and that I wasn't wanted here in the first place."
Will Smith concedes, "I still doubt myself every single
day. What people believe is my self-confidence, is actually my reaction
to fear."
One source says of this worldwide malady, "Low self-esteem is
a thinking disorder in which an individual views him/herself as inadequate,
unlovable, and/or incompetent."
We see low self-esteem all of the time in our counseling at Grace
Life International, regardless of whether it is male, female, single, married,
teens or adults.
As Christians, a large majority of us often believe most of our
Christian friends have it all together and we don't. So, we conclude that
we simply aren't as good as other people, not in a moral sense, but in the
realm of lovability. That is what it all kind of comes down
to, isn't it? Do we believe in our hearts that we are lovable?
How we determine whether we are lovable is the difference between
having good self-esteem or low self-esteem. Let's ask ourselves,
"Is our self-esteem based on our
love-ability or is it on Jesus'
love-ability? That is, is it our abilities which make us
lovable, or it is based on Jesus' ability to make us lovable? Before
someone gets bent out of shape for saying you need to love yourself, Jesus said
you are to love your
neighbor as yourself. (Mark 12:31)
I don't know about you but when I evaluate myself, my failures, my
successes, my appearance, what others say about me, I often fall short.
It's like we are all hoping that each day we will be able to produce more
pluses than negatives, so we will have good self-esteem. And before we
judge those outside the church who do this, let's be clear that this is the
essence of legalism in the church. It is hoping that my spiritual pluses
will outweigh my spiritual negatives so I will be more lovable to God!
Are we truly lovable and if so, why? For each of us who are
in Christ, the answer is that we are 100% lovable, 24/7 because our
Father made us lovable when He completely forgave us and made us righteous in
Christ! Therefore,
being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus
Christ. (Romans 5:1) This doesn't mean everything we do
is pleasing to God but that what we do doesn't make us less lovable to Him.
Let's drill down a little deeper. God has made you lovable
but do you agree with Him? In other words, do you ever say something like
this? Father, because you have made me lovable in Christ, I agree with
you that I am lovable. Why is this so important to agree with
God? Because, we have an enemy who seems to constantly tell us how
unlovable we are. Remember, he is a liar and we must replace his lies
with God's truth!
All of us should have great self-esteem in Christ because He has
made us lovable. But it takes diligence to keep agreeing with God based
on what Jesus has not only done for us but to us. We see many Christians in
our office for counseling who after they come to an understanding of what
God has done to
them, they begin to enjoy a peace with God they never had previously. Why
don't you take out a piece a paper right now and write down the prayer
below? Then go somewhere private where you can pray it out loud.
Father, because you have made me lovable in Christ, I agree with
You, confessing that I am lovable. Remind
me Holy Spirit to pray this often. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Beleive it. It's the Gospel!
Live Free In Christ,
Mark Maulding, President and Founder
www.GraceLifeInternational.com All Content Copyright © 2014 Mark Maulding
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